Use the code EARLYACCESS to get the course for $79 (limited time only)
Have you ever actually sat down with your partner and decided who would be responsible for what at home?
Or, like most people, did you just fall into routines and habits based on what you each thought you should be doing? Maybe you eventually realized that things don't seem to be divided fairly, especially when it comes to the mental load of who is responsible for keeping everything running smoothly.
This course is not just about dividing up chores. It's about examining why and how one of you became the default manager of your lives while the other is going with the flow. Then making changes that last, so you have an equal partnership with a balance that makes both of your lives easier and more sustainable.
What you get:
- Access to all course lessons
- Course materials and exercises to guide you through
- Support from a real person if you have questions about the course
Who should take this course?
To get the most out of the course, I recommend that you both it, either separately or together. (You can take it alone first.) Once you have access to the course, you can replay it as many times as you need to.
This course helps you to work together as a team to create systems that create balance in your home and reduce the mental load overall. It's about creating a balanced and supportive home life, so no one feels overwhelmed or resentful.
In order to do that, it takes two people who are willing to sit down and look at how things are distributed (the physical chores and the mental load), why they are currently distributed that way, and whether it makes sense to make any changes.
What's in the course?
The course is broken into 7 modules, each containing several lessons (5-minutes on average, with 41 lessons in total). Each module contains at least one exercise, so you can implement what you've learned.
Once you've joined the course, you can take the lessons at your own pace, but I lay out a plan to complete the course in 4 weeks (because real change takes a little time).
The lessons include:
- What is "the mental load"?
- How to have conversations about the mental load productively
- How mental load imbalance isn't a just personal or relationship issue, it's systemic
- How mental load imbalance harms both men and women
- The spectrum of default parenting versus equal parenting and how to determine what works best for your family
- How both our past experiences and societal expectations impact the way we divide things at home
- How time inequality shows up in relationships
- How to create systems, habits, and routines that work for you (and how to maintain them over time)
- Real-life examples you can steal or adapt to fit your life
"We've tried this in the past, but it just doesn't last."
Sharing the mental load doesn't come naturally to most couples. That's because we're all shaped by our experiences (from childhood on), social norms, the media, and people, and we live in a society that puts different burdens and expectations on women and men.
Being overwhelmed by the mental load or having imbalance in your relationship isn't just a personal issue or a relationship issue. It's a systemic issue.
We may not be able to fix the system, but we can make real changes in our own home. We can also be an example to others, like our children, which is how progress is made over time.
This course takes you through a transformative process, helping you identify where exactly the imbalance is coming from and how you can make changes that actually last over time.
Why is this important, and why should I take it now?
If one of you had to drop everything for an indefinite period of time, could the other person handle everything? No notes, no lists, no instructions, no reminders.
It was completely unexpected, but when I had to rush our 4-week-old baby to the hospital, that's exactly what happened to us.
I didn't realize it until months later, but there was one thing that held everything together for the 10 days my husband and I spent caring for each of our boys (one at home and one in the hospital).
It was my trust in my husband and his ability to keep everything else together for as long as he needed to, and his trust in me to do the same. That trust allowed us both to focus completely on what was most important in the moment.
When I had to rush out of the house, he didn't need a list, or reminders, or instructions to keep things going without me.
He already knew what to do. He controlled the situation, so our three-year-old felt safe. He got him to bed, then up and to school. He arranged for extra help. He contacted our families. All while supporting me emotionally (one month postpartum) through the whole thing.
That's what it looks like to have an equal partner. Not just one who does their share of the chores, but one who shares in managing the mental load and emotional labor too, so you're not carrying it all alone.
Want to learn more before joining? Visit www.mockingbirdlearning.com.
About Kelsey Baker, Founder of Mockingbird Learning
I'm a mom, attorney, and consultant working full-time in the corporate world and raising two little ones alongside my husband. I founded Mockingbird Learning to use my personal and professional experience to help women and couples achieve balance at home and streamline their lives to make time for what they love.
Use the code EARLYACCESS to get the course for $79 (limited time only)